trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
