so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
