11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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