Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize