y did u give ur computer a hand job?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
