If i come over, it means nothing
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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