Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
