I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize