My friends, they love my intelligence
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
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