I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
