HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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