I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize