I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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