your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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