i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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