About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Randomize
