Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
