I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder