I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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