just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
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