scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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