Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
