so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
