got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize
