Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Can I color on your dick again?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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