I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
