I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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