Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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