I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
