I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
