He is an equal opportunity slut.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
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there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
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Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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