I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Holy shit dude........stairs
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
