Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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