How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
