I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
