dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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