so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
