I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having hate sex.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize