I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She liked it
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?