you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
PANTIES FOUND
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