I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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