All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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