So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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