Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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