I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
