soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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