I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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