Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
