I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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