I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
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The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
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Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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