he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize