Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.