D3 body, D1 cock
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
